August 20th 2008

I go back to school in a couple of days. We've been doing some research online as to what the whole marriage process is regarding immigration. D and J had a terrible time with it but they told me that what they went through is not the 'normal' process. Also remembering the conversation I had with the woman on the plane back from the first time I met Brian, she had married a Brit and was full of complaints (of the system). Will tackle this though. I have downloaded and filled out most of the forms that we will need when we do file.. I'm just trying to figure out how we can actually do this. I wanted to get married at home, I didnt really want to have a desert wedding.

August 2nd 2008

We went for another drive up to Mt. Lemmon today and after a spot of hiking we were standing watching the sun go down and I was spouting random drivel.. I barely remember what I was saying so it can't have been anything too interesting.. anyway. After that, I casually mentioned something regarding the correct pronoun to use in a situation and I called B 'husband' at which point he turned around and said, 'will do it then? Will you marry me?' My heart felt like it became three sizes too big for my chest in that moment and I shouted 'YES!' and waved my arms in the air. Part of me now thinks I probably looked like a complete twat and if anyone else was watching it would have provided good chuckle fodder but I don't care. I'm so happy.. and this time is so right.

July 20th 2008

Saturday we went down to the dmv to get my learners permit! I passed the written test first go and now I'm allowed to drive with B in the car. It's a lot of fun and I'm learning really well. I was going at 50mph yesterday! And I drove part way up mount lemmon. I also drove along a busy highway altho i got a little freaked out and almost pulled over at one point.
yesterday we went hiking up a stream in the mountains and I fell twice. The first time I was going down a hill and the earth was wet so i skidded and landed on my arse. (my arse has always been handy padding for falls) the next time I was climbing up a rock, slipped and fell sideways then ended up on my arse in a bush, i leapt up thinking 'bugs, spiders, eek!' and almost fell again. The second time I fell I got a scrape on my leg but we carried on anyway.
It reminded me a lot of when I was a kid and you kinda were afraid of falling but also had to just think that it wouldnt happen otherwise youd achieve nothing. Like when you learn to ride a bike, you know you're going to fall off, you know you're going to end up with scabs and bruises eventually but the idea of riding the bike places makes you not be afraid. This is an important lesson. It's also why i need to learn how to swim, because I am afraid in the water, but I need to face that fear and just BE scared.. then get over it.

July 9th 2008

I arrived a couple of days ago. B met me at the airport with a big hug and kiss, and was so excited to see me again that he drove me half the way to California before he realised where he was going and we had to turn around. On the plane I sat next to an Eastern European woman who told me all the reasons she loves Arizona and hates wherever it is she is from..mostly this involved weather so I spent the majority of the flight watching films. I was excited to come back to the US but also sad to leave the UK behind cause now I spend most of my time here when I would rather be closer to home. The world is getting smaller all the time but my world is not small enough. I feel a bit like Persephone at times like this, spending all this time with my love and only a few months with my mother. I don't know why I'm so attached, althought I suspect it has something to do with the inability to do something. Like, I only want to do something if I'm unable. This has been one of the working principles of my life 'you can't go to america', 'yes I bloody well can! Watch me.' And this state of affairs isn't the case all the time, at least I hope not.

An Explanation and Overview

This blog is about my journey and my experiences as a new immigrant moving through the seven circles of hell that make up USCIS (that's an immigration joke, funny eh?). These entries are typed up versions of physical journal entries that I keep on a when-I-remember basis. People I mention are real, although their names may have been changed. Just in case anyone official happens across this blog and takes it upon themselves to prolong my case even further.